How do we balance personal, work and family life? This is a constant challenge for me even though I no longer have the responsibility of caring for my mom, or son. On many occasions, I wake up with so many tasks and unfinished projects screaming for my attention.
At the beginning of the year, I spoke about not making resolutions, and long lists of things I wanted to accomplish this year. Instead, I spoke about creating better habits which would eventually lead to success.
I am finding in my everyday entrepreneurial activities, there are some days when I am so busy with one activity, that something else falls along the wayside, and I end the day feeling, “incomplete.”
Talking with other women like myself, it is apparent that we constantly move between staying with and making time for our loved ones and friends, as well as helping to keep a roof over our heads. We all have our own ways of trying to cope and make things work, but ultimately there are some basic things we need to harmonize.
1. Set your own compass
In other words, be clear about your own core values and purpose. These are our inner compass for how we best utilize the talents, and natural genius we uniquely have to express in the world through our work and life. When we stay true, it naturally reduces the amount of stress we are under. This honors our spirit in everything we think, do and say daily.
2. Be clear about your priorities
What is the most important thing in your life? What is the second most important? Then, which third thing is also important? When we are clear about what to prioritize first, making choices and decisions from this position, is less stressful.
3. Know your limits
What do you want and do not want for your business? Where do you draw the line between work time and family or personal time? When does your work day start and end? What is the your sacred time with family and loved ones? If necessary, put it on your calendar and color code it. I find that the most crucial, or important should have the color that stands out most.
4. Manage your own health first
I find that in my own life that when my energy is low, and I do not have the ability to take care of the important people and other things in my life, everyone and everything loses out.
Ensuring that we eat healthily, and make time for some kind of exercise, equip us with the energy to cope with stressors. Trust me, your loved ones will thank you for being proactive in taking good care of yourself as you are learning to balance personal, work and family time.
5. Get your sleep
Getting enough sleep is very important! This is the time when our bodies rejuvenate to help us handle any challenge. Studies have shown that the lack of sleep can create many negative effects, such as, the loss of attention and productivity, forgetfulness, depression, weight gain, premature aging, high blood pressure, heart disease, and diabetes, and even more.
My own sleep cycle over the years has been affected due to caregiving and having to stay up most nights with my mom before she passed. Even now, three years later, I do not get enough sleep. I suffer from most of the aforementioned effects, and can confirm that I am most ineffective when this happens. I am learning some mindful meditations, and other techniques to help me unwind and calm my mind for a more restful and earlier night’s sleep.
6. Communicate your wants and needs clearly
As much as we like to think that our significant others can read our thoughts, they (mostly) cannot. Instead of making them guess, and being disappointed when they do not know exactly what you want, ask for what you need. Practice having open and honest conversations with your loved ones so that everyone feels heard, seen and respected. This will help to prevent unfilled expectations, and skewed assumptions.
7. Fill your cup
You know the expression that says, ” If mama ain’t happy, nobody is happy?” We women need to make sure we spend time doing things that rejuvenate our souls. We need to do things that are important to us, such as maybe praying, meditating, getting a good massage, or mani/pedi, doing yoga, taking a walk, or anything that de-stress us.
In fact, when we fill our cups with goodness regularly, this makes us feel that in the realm of things, we matter too, and it will calm our minds and lighten our souls.
8. Giving and receiving 100%
It is often said that being in a relationship is give and take, that individually we give 50% and this makes the 100%. However, I think and have read that it should really be everyone giving 100% of themselves, attention, and time to those we are in relationship with, including those we work with, or do business with.
We must be in the moment with them as best as we can. This helps us to feel fully seen and heard, our hearts open up, and we create a stronger connection with each other, build trust and encourage cooperation.
In other words, when everyone feels important and that they matter, there are less misunderstandings, and it gets easier to get the balance with personal, family and work relationships.
The more we practice respecting these boundaries, the more we will respect our core values. We are also creating separate ‘neural’ pathways in our brains for those different areas of our lives. As we do this, it becomes so much easier to “switch the code,” or shift gears in our minds to focus on, and be fully present in that particular relationship we are attending to. This is how you achieve balance in the most effective manner in your personal, work and family life.
I always keep my Promises!
How do you balance your personal, work and family life? Did any of the listed ones resonate with you? Is it getting easier to balance over time? Let’s talk about it!