How To Be More Successful By Changing Your Birthday Philosophy And Embracing Your Personality

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A month ago, I celebrated a Birthday. Based on the time of year, I am told that I am a Capricorn. I have always been curious to find out if what these signs say about us is true based on what we know about ourselves. I have discovered that I like what they say about me, and many of them are true.

In my quest to discover more about myself, I find myself open to reading anything that attempts to describe my personality. I also have to caution myself not to get “gung ho” on these revelations, but to process everything carefully.

On my Birthday, January 9, I made a call to a dear friend. She was the friend who I mentioned earlier in one of my posts, who told me, after asking what it was that I really wanted, ” to do do what I want.” She shares the same birthday as me, and I called to wish her, ” Happy Birthday.” I ventured to ask her questions about how she was spending her special day. This started the conversation into similarities and dissimilarities.

I have been an introvert all of my life. In fact, this discovery enabled me to see that I was not weird, or that I did not love people. Always being uncomfortable in social settings, feeling tired after being in a crowd, having no desire to be the center of attention, preferring to stay in the background, doing my best thinking when alone, loving being alone, and just always trying to turn off my mind that would not shut up, were all just a part of who I am. This was liberating for me!

My friend, on the other hand, was not so introverted. She told me of her boldness in doing some things, did not mind being the center of attention ( her style of dressing drew attention to her), and being around others energized her. There are still things I am yet to discover about her because I am sure she has a lot more in common with me.

I have mentioned that I am a Capricorn, and have also added that I am an Introvert. What is the purpose of this? I think when we celebrate a birthday, it forces us to think about ourselves, our lives, and the direction we are going in towards either achieving our goals and desires, or letting them fall by the wayside. My previous philosophy about birthdays was the older I get, I should slow down. Now, I am changing my birthday philosophy so I can be more successful.

The traits of a Capricorn they say, is that we are ambitious, responsible, and resourceful. We are the most intelligent sign of the entire zodiac, so we give great advice. We always have ideas about how to solve problems. The not so good traits are that we are pessimists, even though we think we are realists, and that we have trouble enjoying good things while they last because we are constantly worried about what is going to go wrong in the future (

I recently stumbled on a site, This site suggested I take a test to discover whether or not I was an introvert, or an extrovert. After completing the test, my results showed that I am in fact an introvert, and my personality type code is ISFJ, which in a nutshell calls me the Protector, because I am a compassionate and industrious caretaker, who is motivated to provide for others and protect them from perils., lists 19 signs to look for if I think I am an ISFJ. For the purpose of the point I am making, I will list the relevant traits.

My Personality Traits that are Congruent with my Birthday Philosophy:

  • My five senses are my superpowers- I have a a very sharp eye, and miss very little in my surroundings.
  • I am meticulous, even to the point of perfectionism– my attention to detail and wanting to make sure everything is in order, can stress me, raises my anxiety, and then it results in unhealthy perfectionism.
  • I usually stay in the background- I prefer to work quietly behind the scene to ensure everyone has what they need.
  • I take my responsibilities personally- Everything is personal to me- at home and work.
  • I struggle telling people, “no.” I am service- oriented, and love pleasing others which sometimes cause them to take advantage of me.
  • I crave structure and order- I tend to get stressed in unpredictable or chaotic environments. I am not comfortable “winging” it. Train me, show me my responsibilities, and I will follow it to a “T”. Change is hard for me.
  • I do not leave things unfinished– I crave closure, so I do not start something if I think it is impractical, and I cannot complete.
  • Criticism is my poison- I take things really personally, so any negative criticism, especially from those close to me, cuts me very deeply.
  • I am often mistaken for an extrovert- I question my introversion sometimes because many times I come out of my “shell”, use my strong social skills, become articulate in making small talk when I have to, even though deep down I am feeling frazzled and drained from the interaction, and prefer to be home by myself watching my favorite show, crafting, or just being alone.
  • I tend to be a very private person and do not like expressing my emotions in a public or attention getting way, because I take things personally.

Based on my personality, my career field should lead me to established organizations, such as education, medicine, or of a charitable nature. Some of us also become nurses, counselors, interiors designers, or customer service representatives. In fact, the underlying reason to these careers is that my personality prefers anything that allows me to help others in a really practical way, without dealing with too much corporate politics. This is so me!

When I think about some of the “serious” types of jobs the personality test says are best for me, and I think about what I am pursuing now, I wonder if I am being true to my real self. Am I really doing what I should be doing? Am I deceiving myself, and following a path that will bring little success?

When my birthday happened earlier, I thought about the “combination,” Capricorn and ISFJ personality. I thought about my present career path- entrepreneur, blogger, and internet marketer, and every other ideas/dreams I had, and my over thinking mind started analyzing everything.

The answer to these questions is a resounding “No!” My greatest desire to not work in an organization anymore was to get away from the corporate politics- believe me, many of these organizations operate like crabs in a bucket trying to get out. I was constantly stressed seeing and hearing how people in these organizations treated each other, especially supervisors with their subordinates, and everyone trying to be someone at all cost.

I remember very clearly that when I reached a milestone birthday, I had the overwhelming desire to break out of my shell. Even though I crave structure, am a workaholic and will give everything I am and have to others, I usually stay in the background, change is hard for me, criticism is poison to me, I am sensitive and sentimental, and I do not like telling people “no,” I wanted to change things up.

I have felt for many years I was the way I was- trying to stay “safe” and “toned” down, because that is what others expected of me.

I am conservative in my thoughts and beliefs, and there is no changing that, but a little rebellion set in and I felt the need to not conform to other peoples’ expectation of me, and just be me, who was a blend of seriousness and fun-(even though having fun with a lot of people is tiring for me). One of the very first thing I did was to give myself another ear piercing. Why is this worthy of mention? I felt I was moving away from the “older” accepted, only one set of piercing rule.

I know that being Capricorn and having the ISFJ personality do not fully define me because in addition to this I am a Christ follower. I do however, see similarities in these descriptions, and who I am discovering and accepting about myself. Many of the descriptions, I did not know had a name or definition. All I knew was that I experienced and knew them about myself before the explanations. So the cohesion has taken place, and I better understand who I am, and why I do the things I do, think the way I do, feel the way I do, and approach things the way I do.

I love who I am. I love this feeling in me that there is much more to me than I allowed myself to believe and accept. I believe that the “rebellion” I feel to do and be different is not from anywhere else but the DNA my Creator put in me. There is so much more to me than meets the eye. There is so much creativity I am discovering. I do not have to be afraid of the evolution taking place, because I am my Farther’s child, no matter what.

Based on the more careful and structured aspect of my personality- the fact that I do not like criticism, putting myself in the limelight , or sharing my feelings and thoughts, it seems starting a blog and getting more into social media, would be a contradiction, because comments from others can be cruel. I think about this and wonder if I will remain steadfast in the midst of that.

I can and will be successful if I keep things in perspective, and stay true to myself. Not every Capricorn, or introvert has the same traits, but I do have much potential. I became aware of that from of a song I learnt when I was much younger, “..I am a great big bundle of potentiality..”

The description given of the traits of a Capricorn, was not really a revelation for me. It states that we give great advice, have ideas about how to solve problems, and at the same time we are pessimistic that things will or can go wrong eventually, even if they are going well now. This confirmed to me that the name and purpose of my blog, ” Such is Life According to Val”, is a testament to the fact of who I am, someone who wants to help solve problems, realizing that life has uncertainties and we must approach it as such, making sure we know how to fix the things that go wrong. I am convinced I am doing what I must.

Starting my blog, creating content, getting my mind wrapped around getting more involved in social media because I have something to say and offer, working on creative home projects, bleaching my hair, adding more piercings etc, are just part of the journey.

Another Birthday?

Birthdays can do a “number’ on you. They can depress, excite, sober, motivate you, and elicit so many other emotions and feelings. My recent birthday made me think about where I am, where I am going, and how I am getting there. I am not set on one path. Over time, my desires might change, and I might pursue something else. The important thing is that I am doing what I am with eyes wide open, full of excitement regarding the possibilities, with God as my Guide.

It is important for each of us to understand who we are, sometimes taking tests like the personality test I took, looking deep into our souls, and maybe sometimes even asking trusted loved ones to be real with us about what they see in us. This can help us to figure things out a lot sooner. Do not be afraid of wanting to change, or what you discover about yourself. Keep your actions focused on doing the right thing, and not hurting others, and you cannot go wrong. We have freedom in Christ to be and do everything He wants us to be and do.

Have you ever completed a personality test? Do you pay attention to what your astrological sign says about you? Or, does even considering anything astrological seem taboo to you? Has it ever brought any revelations or discoveries to you? How did your last birthday affect you?

I would love to hear your thoughts.

I always keep my Promises!


I'm Valerie Darlington ( MBA-Healthcare). A Jamaican born entrepreneur, philanthropist, and blogger who help 50+ women learn how to make money, look good, get healthier, retire well, and be more successful in the second half of their lives. Dogs are my Kryptonite, and my forte is history and research. I am obsessed with researching and finding the best, most effective way to accomplish any task set before me. I am on a journey - committed to finding the best, productive, and most fun way to live after doing the parenting thing, and caring for elderly parents ( I have so much experience here). I am committed to helping you, the mature woman figure out and do the same with the "what nexts?" of your life.

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